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**This post has been entered in Tuesday Twister at GNOWFGLINS and Real Food Wednesday at Cheeseslave!!)
Here are three of my favorite soup recipes! They are great winter comfort foods.
Chicken Chili
Ingredients:
¾ cup chopped onion
1 large green pepper, chopped
2 tbsp. olive oil
1 large clove of garlic, minced
1 – 2 jalapenos, chopped
6 oz. tomato juice
6 c. chicken stock
2 large chicken breasts (about 1.5 lbs)
3 15.5 oz. cans chili beans
3 tbsp. cumin
4 tbsp. chili powder
Directions: Heat oil on medium, add green pepper, jalapeno, onion, and garlic. Cook until vegetables are soft, 5 – 10 minutes. Add the rest of the ingredients and stir to combine. Taste and adjust cumin and chili powder if a spicier flavor is desired. Cook for 1 – 2 hours until chicken and vegetables are cooked through. Remove chicken from pot and cut into bite size pieces; return to chili. Serve immediately or freeze for later. Makes 6 – 8 servings.
Potato Soup
Ingredients:
2 tbsp. butter or coconut oil
3 strips bacon, chopped
½ cup onion, chopped
2 stalks celery, chopped
2 tbsp. flour
2 medium potatoes, chopped
3 cups chicken broth or stock
½ tsp. celery salt
½ tsp. thyme
½ tsp. parsley
¼ tsp. black pepper
½ pint cream or coconut milk
Directions:
Melt butter in large saucepan. Add bacon, onions, celery, and spices, cooking until veggies are soft and bacon is crisp. Add flour and stir until it is smooth. Then, add potatoes and broth or stock and cook on medium heat (soup should boil lightly) until potatoes are soft. Stir; add cream. Heat through, remove from heat, and serve immediately. Add green onions, if desired. 2 servings.
Chicken Noodle Soup
Directions:
4 tbsp. butter or coconut oil
4 tbsp. flour
4 stalks celery, chopped
4 small carrots, peeled and chopped
1 small white onion, diced
4 – 6 oz. chicken breast
8 cups chicken stock
8 oz. noodles
1 tsp. sea salt
1 tsp. celery salt
½ tsp. pepper
Directions:
Saute onion in butter. Add flour, stir and cook until flour is lightly brown. Add carrot, celery, stock, vegetables, chicken breast, and spices. Cook 1 – 2 hours, until chicken is tender. Add noodles 5 – 10 minutes before serving. Serves 4 – 6.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Water Kefir Update
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Last time I posted about water kefir, we'd made several unsuccessful batches and one successful batch. That is, drinkable. We had ideas for more. So, now that it's been a few weeks, are you curious how it went?
We have success! The newest batch of kefir is going fast because we both really like it and are drinking 2 - 3 bottles a day. So, let me share with you our new favorite recipe:
Grape Water Kefir (Makes 12 16-oz. bottles)
5 quart mason jars
15 c. water
1.25 c. sugar
5 tbsp. water kefir grains
7.5 c. grape juice (preferably organic)
12 16-oz. glass bottles with tightly sealing top
Plastic spoon
Cheesecloth and rubberbands
In each (clean) mason jar, add 3 c. water and 1/4 c. (white) sugar. Stir to dissolve the sugar. Add 1 tbsp. of kefir grains to each jar. (Use a plastic spoon for all of this.) Cover each jar with a piece of cheesecloth and attach it with a rubberband. Allow the jars to sit 2 days.
Strain the kefir grains through cheesecloth and set aside to reuse. Pour 1.25 c. of the kefir into each glass bottle. Then, add 5 oz. (1/2 c. + 2 tbsp.) grape juice to each bottle. Cap the bottles. Let them sit on the counter 2 - 3 days, until you start to see bubbles developing around the edges. Then, refrigerate them and enjoy! Make sure to point the bottles away from you when opening because they will "pop" pretty nicely!
This version tastes just like grape soda to me, without the artificial aftertaste. Stronger-flavored juices seem to do better than weaker ones. If you're going for a "soda substitute," grape or cherry juices will produce good ones. Other people like to get fancy with their water kefir and add egg shells (honestly, we should probably try that for the calcium), dates, lemon slices, and lots of other things. I found this all confusing and decided to just skip it. The version we have is yummy and easy!
We have a batch of cherry going right now, and I expect that will be yummy too! Soon maybe we'll try cranberry, and you could also try blueberry, pomegranate, or whatever other flavor (or blend of flavors) that you enjoy!
In case you have different sized bottles, the proportion is 2 parts water kefir to 1 part juice.
Have you tried water kefir yet? Do you think it would be a good substitute for your family if you enjoy soda?
Like what you read? Subscribe over on the right and get posts everyday in your email!
Please visit our new site, ModernAlternativeMama.com.
Comments on this post have been locked and updates are no longer being made to this page. Please click here to view this article on the new site.
Last time I posted about water kefir, we'd made several unsuccessful batches and one successful batch. That is, drinkable. We had ideas for more. So, now that it's been a few weeks, are you curious how it went?
We have success! The newest batch of kefir is going fast because we both really like it and are drinking 2 - 3 bottles a day. So, let me share with you our new favorite recipe:
Grape Water Kefir (Makes 12 16-oz. bottles)
5 quart mason jars
15 c. water
1.25 c. sugar
5 tbsp. water kefir grains
7.5 c. grape juice (preferably organic)
12 16-oz. glass bottles with tightly sealing top
Plastic spoon
Cheesecloth and rubberbands
In each (clean) mason jar, add 3 c. water and 1/4 c. (white) sugar. Stir to dissolve the sugar. Add 1 tbsp. of kefir grains to each jar. (Use a plastic spoon for all of this.) Cover each jar with a piece of cheesecloth and attach it with a rubberband. Allow the jars to sit 2 days.
Strain the kefir grains through cheesecloth and set aside to reuse. Pour 1.25 c. of the kefir into each glass bottle. Then, add 5 oz. (1/2 c. + 2 tbsp.) grape juice to each bottle. Cap the bottles. Let them sit on the counter 2 - 3 days, until you start to see bubbles developing around the edges. Then, refrigerate them and enjoy! Make sure to point the bottles away from you when opening because they will "pop" pretty nicely!
This version tastes just like grape soda to me, without the artificial aftertaste. Stronger-flavored juices seem to do better than weaker ones. If you're going for a "soda substitute," grape or cherry juices will produce good ones. Other people like to get fancy with their water kefir and add egg shells (honestly, we should probably try that for the calcium), dates, lemon slices, and lots of other things. I found this all confusing and decided to just skip it. The version we have is yummy and easy!
We have a batch of cherry going right now, and I expect that will be yummy too! Soon maybe we'll try cranberry, and you could also try blueberry, pomegranate, or whatever other flavor (or blend of flavors) that you enjoy!
In case you have different sized bottles, the proportion is 2 parts water kefir to 1 part juice.
Have you tried water kefir yet? Do you think it would be a good substitute for your family if you enjoy soda?
Like what you read? Subscribe over on the right and get posts everyday in your email!
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Health News Tuesday: GM Foods, HIV Tests, Six Risky Chemicals in your Body
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Please visit our new site, ModernAlternativeMama.com.
Comments on this post have been locked and updates are no longer being made to this page. Please click here to view this article on the new site.
Health News Tuesday!
Remember, today is the first time that this is a carnival! Enter your link in the Mr. Linky box below. You can link to any interesting news articles you have found, articles you have reviewed on your blog, or any posts you have done about how to be healthier -- changing your eating habits, getting over colds, etc. They don't have to be new posts, just something that would be of interest to my audience and health-related!
Too Much TV Can Mean Earlier Death
A new study shows that people who watch more than 4 hours of TV per day are more likely to die, especially of heart disease.
Coconut Oil and Milk are Good For You
New details on why, and how to use them.
Full Body Scanners May cause DNA Damage
The scanners used at the airport, besides being a violation of your privacy (they outline your private areas quite well) also may cause DNA damage because they emit radiation.
Plans for British 'GM Food Revolution' Come Under Fire
Scientists, organic experts, and agriculture experts are speaking out against GM farming.
HIV/AIDS Test a Myth
Exclusive footage from a new documentary, plus commentary.
Six Risky Chemicals You're carrying in your Body
Six most common chemicals in our bodies and the sources.
Please visit our new site, ModernAlternativeMama.com.
Comments on this post have been locked and updates are no longer being made to this page. Please click here to view this article on the new site.
Health News Tuesday!
Remember, today is the first time that this is a carnival! Enter your link in the Mr. Linky box below. You can link to any interesting news articles you have found, articles you have reviewed on your blog, or any posts you have done about how to be healthier -- changing your eating habits, getting over colds, etc. They don't have to be new posts, just something that would be of interest to my audience and health-related!
Too Much TV Can Mean Earlier Death
A new study shows that people who watch more than 4 hours of TV per day are more likely to die, especially of heart disease.
Coconut Oil and Milk are Good For You
New details on why, and how to use them.
Full Body Scanners May cause DNA Damage
The scanners used at the airport, besides being a violation of your privacy (they outline your private areas quite well) also may cause DNA damage because they emit radiation.
Plans for British 'GM Food Revolution' Come Under Fire
Scientists, organic experts, and agriculture experts are speaking out against GM farming.
HIV/AIDS Test a Myth
Exclusive footage from a new documentary, plus commentary.
Six Risky Chemicals You're carrying in your Body
Six most common chemicals in our bodies and the sources.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Mama Cloth
**We've moved!!**
Please visit our new site, ModernAlternativeMama.com.
Comments on this post have been locked and updates are no longer being made to this page. Please click here to view this article on the new site.
**This post has been entered in Works for Me Wednesdays at We Are THAT Family and Things I Love Thursdays at Diaper Diaries.**
Ever heard of "mama cloth?" It's cloth pads to replace the disposable ones typically used during your monthly "visitor." (I've barely had a need in the last three years, since I've been pregnant most of the time from May '07 - Jul. '09 and just got it back Sunday!) But, mama cloth is really great for you and the environment! And I did use it postpartum with Daniel. I'm liking using it now too. A lot of people say their first postpartum period is really painful and awful and this time I'm having no pain at all (which wasn't true when I got it back after Bekah and I was still using disposable pads!). I really think the cloth is making a difference because I always had cramps and general soreness and fatigue before.
So why should you use mama cloth? Here are a few reasons:
*Disposable pads contain dioxin and other chemicals, which can cause serious and as yet unknown reproductive problems (like PCOS, infertility, or even just extra cramping and bleeding. Think about it -- you're pressing these chemicals up against your most sensitive regions and you're actually absorbing the chemicals!).
*Cloth pads feel softer and nicer. No more crunchy, bulky pads!
*Cloth pads are much greener -- just save them in a zippered, waterproof bag and wash at the end of the week. Nothing to throw in a landfill.
*Potential for reduced pain and reduced bleeding (due to the fact that you're not exposing yourself to the chemicals anymore). This is really serious. I believe that our exposure to these chemicals is causing us to experience longer bleeding, more painful periods, PCOS, and other reproductive disorders. Eliminating your exposure to harmful chemicals could, over time, cure you of these problems (and red raspberry leaf tea can reduce your pain naturally in the mean time, by the way).
*Always have clean pads (bleeding more than usual? Lasting longer? Do a wash and you'll have fresh pads in an hour or two, no trips to the store).
There are many places that you can buy pads if you want to (look at the resources below). You can also make your own. I made all of mine. They're not like the old rags women used to use. They're shaped, absorbent, they snap in place, and the top layer wicks the moisture away from you.
(You can also buy cloth tampons if you're interested, but I can't quite get my head around that one. Some people knit them and stuff them with cotton padding, leaving a trail of yarn at the end to remove it. Of course there's no applicator with this type. But, if you really hate the feeling of pads, you can try this. Another option is the Diva Cup, which many women prefer, but I believe these are silicone, and you do have to put it inside. If you don't like putting things inside or you are allergic to silicone or latex -- I can't remember which they're made from -- cloth pads are for you.)
There are many free patterns out there to make your own mama cloth, and many that you can pay for as well. I offer one for free on another website (listed in the resources). The patterns have instructions with them. They really do sew up quickly; I made 30 pads in just a few hours. My pattern also comes in two different sizes. If you don't have a snap press, you can use sew-on snaps, or Velcro (though I recommend Aplix or Touchtape instead).
For postpartum use, along with my pads, I also sewed several 6" x 6" flannel wipes, and I kept a peri bottle in the bathroom. Whenever I used the bathroom, I would wash off warm water from the peri bottle and wipe gently with the flannel wipes. It was soooo very soft when I was sore and swollen from birth, and I just tucked it all into my little zippered, waterproof bag! I had cloth (bamboo terry, also very soft) ice packs that I had dipped into comfrey leaf tea and frozen that went into these bags. I highly recommend this system, and you can use parts of it every time, not just postpartum.
Check out the resources section for more information!
Resources:
Comfy Cloth Pads
Why Use Cloth?
Mama Cloth Pattern
Fleece Mama Cloth Pads
Cloth Pads Database (links to many tutorials and patterns)
Diva Cup
Keeper (like a Diva Cup)
What do you use during your period? Are any of these options new to you?
Please visit our new site, ModernAlternativeMama.com.
Comments on this post have been locked and updates are no longer being made to this page. Please click here to view this article on the new site.
**This post has been entered in Works for Me Wednesdays at We Are THAT Family and Things I Love Thursdays at Diaper Diaries.**
Ever heard of "mama cloth?" It's cloth pads to replace the disposable ones typically used during your monthly "visitor." (I've barely had a need in the last three years, since I've been pregnant most of the time from May '07 - Jul. '09 and just got it back Sunday!) But, mama cloth is really great for you and the environment! And I did use it postpartum with Daniel. I'm liking using it now too. A lot of people say their first postpartum period is really painful and awful and this time I'm having no pain at all (which wasn't true when I got it back after Bekah and I was still using disposable pads!). I really think the cloth is making a difference because I always had cramps and general soreness and fatigue before.
So why should you use mama cloth? Here are a few reasons:
*Disposable pads contain dioxin and other chemicals, which can cause serious and as yet unknown reproductive problems (like PCOS, infertility, or even just extra cramping and bleeding. Think about it -- you're pressing these chemicals up against your most sensitive regions and you're actually absorbing the chemicals!).
*Cloth pads feel softer and nicer. No more crunchy, bulky pads!
*Cloth pads are much greener -- just save them in a zippered, waterproof bag and wash at the end of the week. Nothing to throw in a landfill.
*Potential for reduced pain and reduced bleeding (due to the fact that you're not exposing yourself to the chemicals anymore). This is really serious. I believe that our exposure to these chemicals is causing us to experience longer bleeding, more painful periods, PCOS, and other reproductive disorders. Eliminating your exposure to harmful chemicals could, over time, cure you of these problems (and red raspberry leaf tea can reduce your pain naturally in the mean time, by the way).
*Always have clean pads (bleeding more than usual? Lasting longer? Do a wash and you'll have fresh pads in an hour or two, no trips to the store).
There are many places that you can buy pads if you want to (look at the resources below). You can also make your own. I made all of mine. They're not like the old rags women used to use. They're shaped, absorbent, they snap in place, and the top layer wicks the moisture away from you.
(You can also buy cloth tampons if you're interested, but I can't quite get my head around that one. Some people knit them and stuff them with cotton padding, leaving a trail of yarn at the end to remove it. Of course there's no applicator with this type. But, if you really hate the feeling of pads, you can try this. Another option is the Diva Cup, which many women prefer, but I believe these are silicone, and you do have to put it inside. If you don't like putting things inside or you are allergic to silicone or latex -- I can't remember which they're made from -- cloth pads are for you.)
There are many free patterns out there to make your own mama cloth, and many that you can pay for as well. I offer one for free on another website (listed in the resources). The patterns have instructions with them. They really do sew up quickly; I made 30 pads in just a few hours. My pattern also comes in two different sizes. If you don't have a snap press, you can use sew-on snaps, or Velcro (though I recommend Aplix or Touchtape instead).
For postpartum use, along with my pads, I also sewed several 6" x 6" flannel wipes, and I kept a peri bottle in the bathroom. Whenever I used the bathroom, I would wash off warm water from the peri bottle and wipe gently with the flannel wipes. It was soooo very soft when I was sore and swollen from birth, and I just tucked it all into my little zippered, waterproof bag! I had cloth (bamboo terry, also very soft) ice packs that I had dipped into comfrey leaf tea and frozen that went into these bags. I highly recommend this system, and you can use parts of it every time, not just postpartum.
Check out the resources section for more information!
Resources:
Comfy Cloth Pads
Why Use Cloth?
Mama Cloth Pattern
Fleece Mama Cloth Pads
Cloth Pads Database (links to many tutorials and patterns)
Diva Cup
Keeper (like a Diva Cup)
What do you use during your period? Are any of these options new to you?
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Indoor Gardens: Part 1
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Recently, we started a hydroponic garden. "Hydroponic" means to grow in water. I didn't get it until I visited an indoor gardening store -- I thought the plants just grew directly in the water. Tomatoes are often grown hydroponically (which is what we are growing) and I couldn't understand how the tomato stalk could possibly stand up in just water. But what did I know?
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Comments on this post have been locked and updates are no longer being made to this page. Please click here to view this article on the new site.
Recently, we started a hydroponic garden. "Hydroponic" means to grow in water. I didn't get it until I visited an indoor gardening store -- I thought the plants just grew directly in the water. Tomatoes are often grown hydroponically (which is what we are growing) and I couldn't understand how the tomato stalk could possibly stand up in just water. But what did I know?
Not much, as it turns out. This post is going to detail our first attempts at starting the garden and all the stuff we learned NOT to do.
First, in hydroponic gardening, there is a "water table" set up with water that circulates and has a nutrient solution in it. There is also a grow light positioned above this table. Within the table are the plants. Each plant is started in a tiny "starter cube," pictured below. Once the roots show on the outside, they are placed inside a big black, open pot filled with little rocks. This is how the plants grow their roots and remain stable -- being planted in these individual pots. Water tables are set up to handle different numbers of plants depending on their size. Ours handles a total of 6 plants at a time.
We purchased organic seeds and organic growing solution, in addition to the water table and light. We are determined to get BETTER tomatoes from this than we could purchase at the store, and cheaper! We determined it would be only about 1/6 the price to grow them than buy them. Maybe less. Hydroponic tomato plants, depending on the source you consult, can bear up to 300 lbs. of fruit per year. It's important to note that tomato plants are perennials, and given ideal growing conditions, can continue to produce much longer than those of us in temperate climates are familiar with.
The first night, we set up our water table with filtered water and checked the PH. It was very wrong. We left it for a couple of days and checked again -- it was much closer after it had sat for a few days and run through the system. We dipped our starter cubes in the solution, put the seeds inside, and left them to sit on the top of the tray, under the light, so they could germinate.
Only they didn't.
Two weeks later we still had nothing. It looked just like it had when we'd planted it. We couldn't figure out why. Then we went back to the indoor gardening store and learned a few things:
*The starter cubes need to remain wet (we'd re-dipped them in the water to keep them wet)
*The starter cubes need to remain in a moist environment
*The starter cubes can't get too much nutrient solution
We had dipped them in the water filled with nutrient solution several times to keep them wet, but they kept drying out. In this process they got WAY too much nutrient solution and this killed the seeds. So, we left the store with more starter cubes and a special plastic tray with a dome lid on it. This tray and lid is where we put the plants so that when the moisture evaporates from the cubes, it goes on the tray and "rains" back down on the cubes, keeping them in a humid environment. This, apparently, is the proper way to start the garden.
So we are trying again now. Hopefully the next round germinates nicely and we'll have some good pictures and updates to give you in a month or so!
Are you interested in indoor gardening? Have you ever tried? If so, what was your experience?
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Alternatives to Credit and Living Within Your Means
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Now that you've made a promise to get rid of credit card debt (hopefully), it's time to explore some alternatives to using credit cards. If you haven't seen our previous posts on ways to save money, please go back and visit them. But now it's time to talk specifically about living within your means.
This goes back to the theme of personal responsibility we've been talking about for awhile now. You have to live within your means: spend what you actually earn, not what you wish you earned. In this country, far too many people feel that they're entitled to a certain type of lifestyle. Perhaps they grew up with it, or perhaps their neighbors have it. And it seems so easy to obtain because credit is available. But credit, of course, is a gamble. If you buy what you can't afford, you can lose it all. And, you are NOT entitled to anything you cannot truly afford (without credit).
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Comments on this post have been locked and updates are no longer being made to this page. Please click here to view this article on the new site.
Now that you've made a promise to get rid of credit card debt (hopefully), it's time to explore some alternatives to using credit cards. If you haven't seen our previous posts on ways to save money, please go back and visit them. But now it's time to talk specifically about living within your means.
This goes back to the theme of personal responsibility we've been talking about for awhile now. You have to live within your means: spend what you actually earn, not what you wish you earned. In this country, far too many people feel that they're entitled to a certain type of lifestyle. Perhaps they grew up with it, or perhaps their neighbors have it. And it seems so easy to obtain because credit is available. But credit, of course, is a gamble. If you buy what you can't afford, you can lose it all. And, you are NOT entitled to anything you cannot truly afford (without credit).
So, let's talk about some alternatives to credit! What can you do?
1) Cash
Good, old-fashioned cash. Dave Ramsey recommends the envelope system. That is, at the beginning of the month (or week, or whatever your budget period is) you take out all the cash you need for household expenses and place them into separate envelopes. One for gas, one for groceries, one for clothing, etc. When the cash in that envelope is gone, that's all you get. You can't spend more in that category until you get paid again.
2) Debit Cards
ONLY DEBIT! If it can be used as credit it's no good. If you don't like carrying around cash, though, debit cards will work. Set up a few different accounts and add the right amount of money to each. Set it up so that when the money's gone, it declines your card. At the least, you'll incur fees if you overspend. We use debit cards. We have three accounts: savings, bill pay (house, electricity, gas, cell phones, insurance, etc.), and "house" (groceries, gas, clothes, etc.). There is only so much in each category, and when it's gone, we cannot spend more.
3) Savings Accounts
This is really huge. When you're contemplating a big purchase, DON'T take out a loan or put it on a credit card! Instead, plan ahead and set aside money to pay for it. Then, when you're ready to buy (you might even earn a little interest in the mean time!), take your money into the store and just buy it. It requires a lot more planning, but this is a good thing. It completely eliminates impulse purchases because you have to really do a lot of research to see if you want the item, which item is the best (like, which model or brand), where you can find the best deal, etc. Sometimes you can even get a discount for paying in cash up front.
It's a good idea to use ALL of these forms of payment at one time or another. Obviously you need to have some cash, for emergencies if nothing else (just $10 or so that you keep). You need to have money (cash or debit) easily accessible for groceries, gas, and other basic necessities. And you should also have a savings account for any major purchases. You may even want to have more than one savings account so you can save for different purchases in different accounts.
The important thing about NOT using credit is that it forces you to live within your means. That is, you spend as much or less than you earn. You can't spend what you don't have if you don't have any credit to rely on. I know I've mentioned this before but it's a really, really important reason why you shouldn't use credit. You must be personally responsible for your spending, which means that you can spend only what you have and not rely on others to give you extra money.
This should give you peace of mind, too, even if it seems difficult or annoying at first, for two reasons:
1) Anything you have bought is YOURS. It will always be yours, unless you decide to sell it or give it away. There is no chance that you'll lose your job or have an unexpected expense come up that prevents you from making payments so that you eventually lose the item. There is no gamble, no risk. You are free and clear.
2) You aren't stuck with a decent part of your budget tied up in minimum monthly payments for the rest of your life, so you have that "extra" money to spend on things you need or want! If you really look at your budget, it's likely that a fair amount of your money each month goes to some type of credit payment -- credit cards, student loans, car loans, mortgage, etc. Imagine what life would be like without any of that! Or even with just a mortgage. Lots better, right?
In case you're still not convinced that credit is bad and you should live within your means, I have even more on this topic coming up soon!
Do you have credit card debt? If not, how do you pay for things?
Do you have credit card debt? If not, how do you pay for things?
Friday, January 8, 2010
Our Story: Part 1
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Today's post is the first in my series on Godly relationships and family life. I thought I would start by sharing our story with you -- how Ben and I met and got married, for this first part.
It was January, 2005. I had broken up with my previous boyfriend in May of 2004, but we had remained close until the end of 2004. It was only in January 2005 that I was able to admit that it was really and truly over between us. I sat down then, and wrote out how I was feeling, and that I felt I was finally ready to start searching for "the one." I was 19, almost 20 (okay, do the math...now you know how old I am!). I wrote out a long list of characteristics: nerdy, into computers, not into sports, tall, big build, religious, local. Then I set it aside and started going to online dating sites.
I met a few guys, and had a few dates. They were all perfectly nice, but...just not for me. I never went on a second date with any of them. In May, I found a Christian dating site. On the general dating sites I'd tried, so many guys seemed into drinking, partying, and having sex outside of marriage -- which I was not. My first experience on the Christian site was, WHOA! There were so many awesome guys with the same values I had. There was one profile in particular that caught my attention...Wattsdude. I looked at several profiles and sent many guys "smiles," but that one...at first, I just clicked off it. But I kept coming back to it. I stared at the picture for a long time. The guy was tall, kind of angry-looking, and standing far back. It was hard to see any details of his features. But somehow, I thought, "I could see myself married to this guy." So I sent him a smile.
The next day he sent me an IM (I'd sneakily put my screen name in my profile). I responded, and we talked for HOURS! I went to bed that night feeling...awesome, special. This was really something. His name was Ben.
Every night for the next week, we talked for hours and hours. Ben was working second shift as a retail manager then, and usually got home between 10 and 11. I would wait, eagerly anticipating his arrival, and we would talk until 3 or 4 in the morning. Sometimes even longer. He said I made him smile, and no one made him smile. I ran downstairs several times to tell my mom things we were talking about. He understood things I thought and felt like no one ever had before.
Then he suggested we meet in person, have a date. He lived two hours away from me, but was willing to drive to me. His location, by the way, was the ONLY thing that did not meet the criteria I'd written out in January! I agreed.
By that time I was in summer school. I remember driving home from school the morning of our first date, filled with hope, and...love. I knew I was in love with him and I hadn't even met him yet. (I learned later that on his way to meet me, he called his sister and told her that he thought he was in love with me, too, and felt we would get married.)
I saw him walking up the driveway that night...he was TALL! (He is 6'2" almost and I am 5'3.") We were so very nervous. We went out for a walk, then out to dinner. He told me all kinds of ridiculous things, lecturing me on why Walmart was good and technology was awesome and telling me how special he is. But, you'd have to know him to understand, he wasn't saying it to be pompous, he was earnest, eager, innocent. He did, and does, tell it like it is and he's not afraid to say things that many others are.
We parted that night, afraid to even get near one another, but agreed to a second date. This time when I said that, I meant it.
We continued to talk for hours every single night. Ben came to see me the following week, and this time we hung out with some friends, went miniature golfing, and watched a movie at my house. He spent some time messing with my parents' computer. I stood behind him, wanting to put my hands on his shoulders, a bit nervous about doing so, and thought, "I could see myself married to this guy." That was when I knew.
In the next few weeks we started to talk about getting married. By the time I'd known him only a month, I knew if he asked me to marry him right then, I would. We would get to know each other more and figure everything else out later. I was absolutely sure I would marry him. I remember going out with friends on June 18th (just over a month after we'd met, and only days after we started "officially" dating -- which, by the way, amounted to him asking me over IM "so are we boyfriend and girlfriend or what?") and telling them, "Do not be surprised to see me engaged by the end of the year."
I visited him for the first time in mid-June, around the time we started dating (actually, we had the "are we dating" conversation that night, after I drove home). I was nervous to drive so far alone but I did. I was so emotional and crazy and excited to be with him. We drove around, and talked, and went bowling, and watched a movie. I was still afraid to touch him or even get too close. But strangely I felt totally comfortable. It was like coming home. That night was the first time we ever hugged each other...even though we were still both pretty nervous!
Soon after, we got into seriously talking about marriage. By mid-July we were sure we would get married. Ben had met my parents a couple times, very briefly. I hadn't met his. We shared our first kiss in mid-July, and said "I love you" for the first time on July 22nd (it's in my journal and it's exactly a year and a week before our wedding!). We talked on the phone now, for hours, and told each other every story we could think of, and spent time each night praying before hanging up. We both prayed for each other and for our relationship, and for other things going on in our lives. We also prayed separately that God would show us the way and bless us if we were meant to be together. We felt sure God had intended us for each other.
In mid-August, Ben decided to take me home to visit his family. There's something you need to understand -- I was his very first girlfriend, ever. His family had teased him for years about never dating, and about how tight-lipped he typically was about his personal life. They barely knew anything about me, other than that we had been dating for a couple months, and he was bringing me for the weekend. I was so nervous, but the second I walked into his parents' home, his mother hugged me and welcomed me. I felt so comfortable being there and talking to everyone. I had never been so comfortable in a new place before, when I was essentially surrounded by a bunch of strangers.
The next morning (keep in mind I met most of his family, including his parents, for the very first time the night before), we got up (from our separate bedrooms!) and had breakfast. We sat and talked while his mother cleaned the kitchen, and just as she was about to walk out of the room, Ben said, "Mom, we have something we want to tell you." (Now, I can only imagine what was going through her head at this point...looking at her 20-year-old son sitting there, eager and goofy with his very first girlfriend, whom she didn't know at all.) She came and sat down. Ben tossed his arm around my shoulders and we looked at each other, all silly and excited, and he said, "We're, um...thinking about getting married next year." His mother just looked at us, and said, "Okay...."
We spent the next hour discussing all of this. His mother was trying to process through all of this...so much at once! Towards the end of the discussion, his father walked into the room. Ben told him our news, and his father just grinned and said, "Yeah, I can see that." He wasn't surprised in the least.
At the end of the weekend, we drove back to my parents' house. They weren't home, and Ben had to leave. But when they got there, I told them our plans. My mom laughed. My dad seemed a bit upset. The ironic part (I learned later) was that while I was gone, my dad told my mom "If it goes well this weekend, they're going to get married." And my mom said, "No way! It's not that serious." Our fathers somehow knew that we were meant to be, while our mothers worried more.
We began planning our wedding in September. By this time, I was driving down and staying with Ben every weekend. He had roommates, so I stayed in his room but slept on the air mattress across the room. We did lots of fun things, and even just hung out (this started his journey to eating better...he'd take me grocery shopping and I'd shake my head when he started to fill the cart with frozen pizzas and fries, so he'd say "Fine! Tell me what to buy," and we'd shop and cook together).
At Christmas, Ben's grandparents picked me up and took me to his parents' house (there were many, many other interesting adventures in there, of the times I met his grandparents, etc. but I don't have time to tell it all now). It was Christmas Eve. Ben said, "Let's take our suitcases upstairs so they're not in the way." His sister had hugged me twice by then, which I thought was a little weird, but whatever. I agreed. We went upstairs and Ben (who was wearing gray sweatpants and a Napoleon Dynamite t-shirt, something I never let him forget) started talking to me. Then he said, "Well, I need to change my pants," and went to close the door. I was really surprised -- didn't he want me to leave the room before he did that? Unlike a lot of couples, we were waiting until we got married and I'd never seen him undressed at all. But, nervously, I went with it. He came over to talk to me again, then got down on one knee, pulled a ring box from beneath the bed, and said, "Will you marry me?" Of course I said yes! (After that I did leave the room and he changed, lol.)
We went downstairs and everyone else knew exactly what had been going on upstairs, and they were all thrilled. He'd driven up the night before and had shown everyone the ring and had told them his plans. I make fun of him all the time for the way he proposed, but he said that if he'd gotten dressed up and taken me out somewhere nice, I would have immediately known. That's true, because Ben hates getting dressed up and going out, so doing so would have meant something big. He said he preferred to surprise me. I wasn't entirely surprised because he had promised to propose by the end of the year and it was Christmas, but I didn't know where or when he was going to do it exactly.
Our wedding date was set for July 29th, 2006. We continued to pray and plan and were so excited to start our lives together. It was torture not being able to be together every second of every day. By May I was spending 5 days a week here (he already owned the house we live in now) and only 2 days at my parents'. The more intimate details of our courtship, I'll skip...but suffice to say that we did wait until we were married.
Anyway, we were married on July 29th and we began our life together! It was wonderful and we feel so blessed and happy to be together. We are sure that God brought us together and we are just thrilled with our life.
More on our story (including children) later....
How did you meet your spouse? Do you feel God brought you together?
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Today's post is the first in my series on Godly relationships and family life. I thought I would start by sharing our story with you -- how Ben and I met and got married, for this first part.
It was January, 2005. I had broken up with my previous boyfriend in May of 2004, but we had remained close until the end of 2004. It was only in January 2005 that I was able to admit that it was really and truly over between us. I sat down then, and wrote out how I was feeling, and that I felt I was finally ready to start searching for "the one." I was 19, almost 20 (okay, do the math...now you know how old I am!). I wrote out a long list of characteristics: nerdy, into computers, not into sports, tall, big build, religious, local. Then I set it aside and started going to online dating sites.
I met a few guys, and had a few dates. They were all perfectly nice, but...just not for me. I never went on a second date with any of them. In May, I found a Christian dating site. On the general dating sites I'd tried, so many guys seemed into drinking, partying, and having sex outside of marriage -- which I was not. My first experience on the Christian site was, WHOA! There were so many awesome guys with the same values I had. There was one profile in particular that caught my attention...Wattsdude. I looked at several profiles and sent many guys "smiles," but that one...at first, I just clicked off it. But I kept coming back to it. I stared at the picture for a long time. The guy was tall, kind of angry-looking, and standing far back. It was hard to see any details of his features. But somehow, I thought, "I could see myself married to this guy." So I sent him a smile.
The next day he sent me an IM (I'd sneakily put my screen name in my profile). I responded, and we talked for HOURS! I went to bed that night feeling...awesome, special. This was really something. His name was Ben.
Every night for the next week, we talked for hours and hours. Ben was working second shift as a retail manager then, and usually got home between 10 and 11. I would wait, eagerly anticipating his arrival, and we would talk until 3 or 4 in the morning. Sometimes even longer. He said I made him smile, and no one made him smile. I ran downstairs several times to tell my mom things we were talking about. He understood things I thought and felt like no one ever had before.
Then he suggested we meet in person, have a date. He lived two hours away from me, but was willing to drive to me. His location, by the way, was the ONLY thing that did not meet the criteria I'd written out in January! I agreed.
By that time I was in summer school. I remember driving home from school the morning of our first date, filled with hope, and...love. I knew I was in love with him and I hadn't even met him yet. (I learned later that on his way to meet me, he called his sister and told her that he thought he was in love with me, too, and felt we would get married.)
I saw him walking up the driveway that night...he was TALL! (He is 6'2" almost and I am 5'3.") We were so very nervous. We went out for a walk, then out to dinner. He told me all kinds of ridiculous things, lecturing me on why Walmart was good and technology was awesome and telling me how special he is. But, you'd have to know him to understand, he wasn't saying it to be pompous, he was earnest, eager, innocent. He did, and does, tell it like it is and he's not afraid to say things that many others are.
We parted that night, afraid to even get near one another, but agreed to a second date. This time when I said that, I meant it.
We continued to talk for hours every single night. Ben came to see me the following week, and this time we hung out with some friends, went miniature golfing, and watched a movie at my house. He spent some time messing with my parents' computer. I stood behind him, wanting to put my hands on his shoulders, a bit nervous about doing so, and thought, "I could see myself married to this guy." That was when I knew.
In the next few weeks we started to talk about getting married. By the time I'd known him only a month, I knew if he asked me to marry him right then, I would. We would get to know each other more and figure everything else out later. I was absolutely sure I would marry him. I remember going out with friends on June 18th (just over a month after we'd met, and only days after we started "officially" dating -- which, by the way, amounted to him asking me over IM "so are we boyfriend and girlfriend or what?") and telling them, "Do not be surprised to see me engaged by the end of the year."
I visited him for the first time in mid-June, around the time we started dating (actually, we had the "are we dating" conversation that night, after I drove home). I was nervous to drive so far alone but I did. I was so emotional and crazy and excited to be with him. We drove around, and talked, and went bowling, and watched a movie. I was still afraid to touch him or even get too close. But strangely I felt totally comfortable. It was like coming home. That night was the first time we ever hugged each other...even though we were still both pretty nervous!
Soon after, we got into seriously talking about marriage. By mid-July we were sure we would get married. Ben had met my parents a couple times, very briefly. I hadn't met his. We shared our first kiss in mid-July, and said "I love you" for the first time on July 22nd (it's in my journal and it's exactly a year and a week before our wedding!). We talked on the phone now, for hours, and told each other every story we could think of, and spent time each night praying before hanging up. We both prayed for each other and for our relationship, and for other things going on in our lives. We also prayed separately that God would show us the way and bless us if we were meant to be together. We felt sure God had intended us for each other.
In mid-August, Ben decided to take me home to visit his family. There's something you need to understand -- I was his very first girlfriend, ever. His family had teased him for years about never dating, and about how tight-lipped he typically was about his personal life. They barely knew anything about me, other than that we had been dating for a couple months, and he was bringing me for the weekend. I was so nervous, but the second I walked into his parents' home, his mother hugged me and welcomed me. I felt so comfortable being there and talking to everyone. I had never been so comfortable in a new place before, when I was essentially surrounded by a bunch of strangers.
The next morning (keep in mind I met most of his family, including his parents, for the very first time the night before), we got up (from our separate bedrooms!) and had breakfast. We sat and talked while his mother cleaned the kitchen, and just as she was about to walk out of the room, Ben said, "Mom, we have something we want to tell you." (Now, I can only imagine what was going through her head at this point...looking at her 20-year-old son sitting there, eager and goofy with his very first girlfriend, whom she didn't know at all.) She came and sat down. Ben tossed his arm around my shoulders and we looked at each other, all silly and excited, and he said, "We're, um...thinking about getting married next year." His mother just looked at us, and said, "Okay...."
We spent the next hour discussing all of this. His mother was trying to process through all of this...so much at once! Towards the end of the discussion, his father walked into the room. Ben told him our news, and his father just grinned and said, "Yeah, I can see that." He wasn't surprised in the least.
At the end of the weekend, we drove back to my parents' house. They weren't home, and Ben had to leave. But when they got there, I told them our plans. My mom laughed. My dad seemed a bit upset. The ironic part (I learned later) was that while I was gone, my dad told my mom "If it goes well this weekend, they're going to get married." And my mom said, "No way! It's not that serious." Our fathers somehow knew that we were meant to be, while our mothers worried more.
We began planning our wedding in September. By this time, I was driving down and staying with Ben every weekend. He had roommates, so I stayed in his room but slept on the air mattress across the room. We did lots of fun things, and even just hung out (this started his journey to eating better...he'd take me grocery shopping and I'd shake my head when he started to fill the cart with frozen pizzas and fries, so he'd say "Fine! Tell me what to buy," and we'd shop and cook together).
At Christmas, Ben's grandparents picked me up and took me to his parents' house (there were many, many other interesting adventures in there, of the times I met his grandparents, etc. but I don't have time to tell it all now). It was Christmas Eve. Ben said, "Let's take our suitcases upstairs so they're not in the way." His sister had hugged me twice by then, which I thought was a little weird, but whatever. I agreed. We went upstairs and Ben (who was wearing gray sweatpants and a Napoleon Dynamite t-shirt, something I never let him forget) started talking to me. Then he said, "Well, I need to change my pants," and went to close the door. I was really surprised -- didn't he want me to leave the room before he did that? Unlike a lot of couples, we were waiting until we got married and I'd never seen him undressed at all. But, nervously, I went with it. He came over to talk to me again, then got down on one knee, pulled a ring box from beneath the bed, and said, "Will you marry me?" Of course I said yes! (After that I did leave the room and he changed, lol.)
We went downstairs and everyone else knew exactly what had been going on upstairs, and they were all thrilled. He'd driven up the night before and had shown everyone the ring and had told them his plans. I make fun of him all the time for the way he proposed, but he said that if he'd gotten dressed up and taken me out somewhere nice, I would have immediately known. That's true, because Ben hates getting dressed up and going out, so doing so would have meant something big. He said he preferred to surprise me. I wasn't entirely surprised because he had promised to propose by the end of the year and it was Christmas, but I didn't know where or when he was going to do it exactly.
Our wedding date was set for July 29th, 2006. We continued to pray and plan and were so excited to start our lives together. It was torture not being able to be together every second of every day. By May I was spending 5 days a week here (he already owned the house we live in now) and only 2 days at my parents'. The more intimate details of our courtship, I'll skip...but suffice to say that we did wait until we were married.
Anyway, we were married on July 29th and we began our life together! It was wonderful and we feel so blessed and happy to be together. We are sure that God brought us together and we are just thrilled with our life.
More on our story (including children) later....
How did you meet your spouse? Do you feel God brought you together?
Like what you read? Subscribe over on the right and get posts everyday in your email!
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